Hi there, sorry to hear that you're struggling!

As for the OCD connection with jealousy...I am diagnosed with OCD and I'm definitely not the jealous type. I also know others with OCD...and I don't think jealousy and OCD are directly connected, to be honest.

Common OCD symptoms include unwanted thoughts, violent images, constant guilt, feeling the need to "confess" all the time, or seek reassurance, feeling the need to perform certain rituals in order to feel better, fearing germs and contamination...the list goes on.

From what you've described, you could have a number of things. I'd suggest seeing a psychiatrist if you want an official diagnosis.