I'm a straight female, but I used to drink a lot and take a lot of painkillers, so I've had probably more sexual experiences with girls than guys (out of convenience and "in the moment", not intentional desire). A lot of my female friends are bi, and several of them have hit on me.

Last year (when high out of my mind), I engaged in a threesome with the guy I was dating at the time and my best friend (who is female and openly bi). Nothing has happened between me and my best friend (sexually) since then, and we're content to keep it that way. Besides, I barely even remember that night, so it's not even awkward. We just have one of those relationships.

I have a bit of a problem trusting guys due to former trauma, so I seem to be able to relax around girls more, and that's when stuff "just happens".

I have a female friend from school that I developed a bit of a crush on. For a while, it was intense enough to make me wonder if I was actually bi. I've decided that I'm not, since (when I'm sober, at least) the only girl I'm attracted to is her. We're pretty close; we talk almost every day, and have confided in one another. I know she's had guy problems too, and I know that she's bi (even if she doesn't say so openly); after having so many bi friends, you can just tell.

My fear is that we'll be hanging out some time and I'll make a move on her...I'm don't think that I'd actually have s*x with her, since it would probably freak me out a bit (and I have issues with sex anyways), but I could see myself hardcore making out with her. However, I don't know if she shares these feelings or if she'd get really really freaked out by this. I'm scared that she'll think I'm a freak or something, even though I wouldn't be able even to force myself to make a move on any other girl besides her. I know she doesn't have any aversions to or problems with gays/lesbians/bisexuals etc., but I'm not sure she's had personal experiences with one (emphasis on PERSONAL).

Not really sure why I'm posting this, just wanna know what any of you would do in this situation, or that I'm not alone. I'm almost afraid to be alone with her because of this, and have kinda avoided chilling with her (alone) outside of school; fortunately, we're both fairly busy so it hasn't come up very often.