Yes I agree SS. I had a good talk with my husband this morning. He comes from a strict family upbringing and was raised Muslim. I told him that we have to be careful not to be so strict like his parents did to him - where she'll end up rebelling like he did. My husband moved on his own when he was 17 to be with me(18). I was still living at home. Unfortunately my mom didn't teach me anything about sex or protecting myself. I was raised Catholic so it was just assumed that you don't date. I think the only reason I remained a virgin till 18, was because I was extremely shy. I wish my mom would have warned me to protect myself, so I could have avoided getting HPV, as I mentioned in the Gardasil thread. I was clueless about STD's when I was a teenager.

So I spoke with him this morning, that we have to figure out a 'happy medium'. If we end up too strict(short leash) she'll guaranteed rebell and resent us - probably move away when she's 16. If we're too leniant she'll have too much freedom. I think I'm going to go to the book store and find a book on raising girls in todays society. I know teaching just abstinance doesn't work.

After the other day my husband was tempted to never let her go to the movies even with a girl from school, but I told him this will backfire and she'll resent us eventually. I told him, she at least deserves credit for being honest in the end. He surprisingly agreed but I could see the worry on his face. His natural reaction is to keep her on a short leash but when I told him "this is what your parents did and did it work for you"? - he agreed it didn't work. So I'm looking for a happy medium - not sure what it is yet lol. I've already educated her about sex, STD's, pregnancy and what boys expect these days and her response so far is "ewwwwwww" lol. My husbands biggest fear is someone could one day put a drug in her drink.

I feel a little better. I always worried that my husband and I would lock horns when it came to my daughters teenage years. I was really worried he would be too strict. For now he seems to agree we need to find a happy medium and make sure we instill good morals but at the same time educate them. Now I just need to find a good book on the subject. I think what scared me was not having a plan since she's my oldest. Plus like you said SS I didn't do the normal teenage things(too shy) and todays society is diffferent - so I'm not quite sure what's a 'happy medium' yet lol. At least I know what direction I'm headed. I can already feel her resentment and that's what was so upsetting to me.