Jen, don't waste your time trying to get me to see the bright side. Once I talk to my lawyer tomorrow and tell him what happened, it's going to be over. I'm going to hand them over to their dad and walk away. It's the best thing. It's got to be better than this constant fighting.

I'm not doing anyone any good.

If I can't be the parent I am, if I have to be the parent that he is to be considered a good parent, I can't do that to my kids. I can't have them go through that at two houses. If I can't do it, they'll have to stay with the current situation and I'll continue to be belittled by him. I can't live with that, and neither should they. So I'll admit defeat one last time and walk away and let him have his way and 25% of my income. I love my daughter, but I can't put her through any more of this. I can't bear to have her see me crying so much. According to HIM, I'm not even allowed to let my kids see me shaken. I wasn't allowed to be me then, and I'm not allowed it now. I have to be a female version of him, and I can't do it. I can't be him. I can't.