I haven't self harmed for about one month not cutting anyway, but I am so low at the moment I feel like I really need to cut, it always makes me feel better and its the only way I can cope really with what is going on. When I self harm I am no longer paranoid and for a few minutes I stop experiencing the really weird things that are going on around me. Its like if I cut myself I am allowing myself to fall in to that depressive state and therefore nothing else matters I am just stuck in my mind and I would rather be in my mind than have to notice the strange things going on around me.
I want to cut so badly but can't cut my arm anymore because its already scarred and will never disappear. I don't want to do it ya know its like an addiction.
I am feeling so low I hope I can fight this :-(