Sweetie first of all, I want to wish you and your family the best. It is very hard to lose a loved one. As you know, I am in a similar position. I am not sure where the grief ends and the depression begins. I think sometimes they go hand in hand. As someone who is depressed going through a grieving process, I am also seeing aspects of depression mixed in with the grief. It is very good you managed to cry and let the emotions out. You will do better in the long run by doing this. I am finding my emotions bottled up pushing myself more into a depression. Please let yourself grieve and you will come out okay. Take very good care of yourself.