I am so depressed it is scaring me. I can't work and my insurance is running out on April 1. I will have to pay out of pocket for therapy because I have Medicare. I will only be getting $800 per month to live on and I have a car payment and car insurance. I am having bad thoughts. I just can't keep doing this, living this life. It sucks and my life is terrible. My doctor said I was unable to work with any productivity whatsoever. He said my condition is chronic with recurring episodes of illness that last up to 12 weeks. Then he said that I get these episodes every 6-18 months. This is how I will be and have been for 20 years. I don't know if I can handle that at all. I am not sure if it is worth it. I don't know what to do. I'm rambling, so I'll stop.