It sounds to me like this situation is temporary. You both have been having a hard time, and this depression was exacerbated.

Feeling like a failure is a vicious cycle, because if you know you're going to fail, you're not likely to try. Chances are, if your partner could get a job, he would feel some success and want to get more. The trouble is doubt of self-worth, most likely. I feel like I would be far more successful if someone actually believed in me. Don't give up on your partner. Even if you end your intimate relationship, you should still talk to them, if you can, if you care. Fear begets failure, and hope begets success.

Your partner needs to talk to someone they trust, but it doesn't have to be a paid therapist. Medication could certainly help. I know I'd be dead by now if it weren't for Wellbutrin. If you do believe in him, let him know. If you don't, go ahead and abandon ship, because if this is just the beginning of him sinking, you'll only go down with him.

In the mean time, whenever he's really bad off, distraction is the name of the game. Whatever one can find to take their mind off their problems.

Best of luck. I wish you both well. I would like to hear more about your situation and offer strategies to help, because I think I understand where he is mentally. Let me know if you're interested. I've done enough ranting for now. Sorry for taking up so much space.