Today I found myself driving to my old therapists office and sitting in the parking lot. I don't know what drove me to go there, I haven't gone there for therapy in over 10 years. I guess part of me misses the way I used to feel when I went there, how safe I felt, how my T would sit in a chair close to me and the hugs my T would give me after each session, making me feel safe and protected. I don't have that with my current T who I've been seeing for two years. She's nice but I don't feel as comfortable with her. She sits near her desk and some days I feel so far away from her. I have a really difficult time talking to her and feel like I always have to have this guard up when I'm there. I wish I could tell her about my previous T but I don't know if I can get up the courage to do it.