Thank you all for the support. It's nice to know people care. I am trying to come to terms with the fact that I will always be on disability, and I will never be able to attain my work and education goals. I can work maybe 10-15 hours a week at a no pressure job, like at a bookstore or a craft store. I have a college degree and I cannot use it. I was an early childhood education teacher. Now I am nothing. I have no worth, no redeeming qualities. I guess right now, I just hate myself.