My aunt is an alcoholic and has been sober for 15 years but still goes to AA. What he needs to realize is that alcoholism is a disease. He CANNOT do it alone. If he could....then he wouldn't be an alcoholic. When something becomes an issue to the point that your wife has left you....that's time to wake up. And if he doesn't then you're better off without him. I know that hurts and sucks to say but it's true. Alcoholism will always be a part of him. It's not like once he quits for a few months he is cured. This is something that requires constant attention so, even if he is serious about quitting, you need to decide if it is something YOU can deal with. Are you going to be okay with not drinking because it's too hard for him to even be near it? And the sponsor situation can be tricky too. If he becomes serious about AA he will have to get a sponsor that he will need to call every time he feels the urge to drink and have to build up an extremely strong relationship with. I know it doesn't sound difficult but it can really hurt when your husband has to call someone else to stay sober rather than talking to you. There are a lot of things to consider even if he does decide to get clean. Decide if you can handle the situation either way. I hope he does but my prior experience tells me that alcoholism can be powerful enough to ruin lives and have people go without food or clean clothes just to have that drink. It's more powerful than anyone can understand.