Hi, Kashia~

I would think the best thing that you can do for your son regarding him divorcing is just be there for him during his time of need. If he should request your suport, then offer him what you can, which I'm sure would be sufficiant.

It is definately a control issue on ur DIL's part, and she is merely seeking any reason to justiy her actions, (if the dog wasn't a reason, it'd most likely be something else).
It's beyond me why she would intently divide herself from your son through so much distance especially not having the need to. There's clearly far more going on with her than she's admitting to, and using her work and the issue about a dog that she couldn't care less about as justifications.

Imo, anyone who can be cruel to animals has something far more going on with them than they let on....and that alone is just the tip of the iceburg to the many red flags indicating her lack of character.
Know that you are doing your son a huge favor by supporting him just by standing your ground regarding the dog issue. This fabricated reason of hers, (as well as the distance thing), is what very well may be the beginning of the end.

In regards to your convos with her mother...don't allow her sobbing and pleading influence you. I really don't understand why the hell she's involving herself at this level, anyway. Perhaps she's completely blinded to who her daughter really is. Or, more likely, her daughter has manipulated her, as well.
There is no need to go any further with her mother regarding details about her own daughter. If she doesn't know yet, she'll learn eventually...maybe.
There's really no point in attempting to discredit someone (DIL) when they have such little credibility to begin with.

That lil pug is very fortunate to have you. Hang onto that sweet thing with all you have, (I certainly would not let it go...especially back to an abusive situation...NO way).

Stand your ground. You're doing the right thing...

Shangrala