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Thine, sometimes SI keeps people from being suicidal. Is your lack of SI causing your suicidal feelings? Thine, you really, really need to get a therapist. No one should be where you are without a therapist.
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Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........
I'm an ISFJ
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