I'm manic today, not a good manic either (is there a good manic, I at least know there are manics that feel better than this one) it's like a "spoiled milk" manic, I"m buzzing, I litterally feel like I'm just vibreating I have so much chaos in my bones right now, so much unspent restless energy, I keep telling myself "make it through these classes, then you can go home and jog a mile at the park" that is the only thing I can focus on, the goal for a day, just survive so I can go run, jump, jog, swim, hell float I don't care, just physically exert myself on that mile track, to just shed this energy.... I can't sit still, I can't focus, I"m constantly tapping my leg, I'm making sure to consume NO caffinee toady, it will only make things worse, I made my daily pot of coffee then started at the coffee pot for a good ten minutes in debate on if I should or shouldn't have any, it all ended up being poured out into the sink...

I'm hungry, but I'm finding it hard to eat, I can't hadle the textures, the feel, it makes me gag, heck I don't know if this is the right place to post, I have so much ick coming up from a upcoming trigger (Easter) and memories have been popping up left and right, I wonder if it spurred my mania...

just ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!