Thanks for your answers. That made me feel somehow better.

In other thread somebody mentioned they feel bipolar may be a gift...and honestly, I also feel that way sometimes and I am often not sure if I want to be normal... I just want to be able to deal with my emotions a bit better... but I do not want to get rid of them. I actually like my highs and I sometimes can channel my emotions when I am low in useful ways (if I am not totally down, than it's out of question).

I am an artsy and creative person and that is a big part of my personality. If I lost this, it would seriously kill me.