Good question Byzantine, not sure what to do next, I'm open to suggestions...my emotion this morning is not so much hurt feelings, as an anxiety that people I thought I could trust will take sides with one of us or the other, and I would rather not drag them into it...whatever is going on here is better for a reputable marriage counselor, perhaps, than mutual friends and relations entering the fray....one broken relationship shouldn't break more. Hard to find $$$ for counseling, but I maybe I need to face up to it...probably have some unused stuff I could sell! :-)