I remember when I first found out about my mom's death. I was at partial and my t told me my sis was in the lobby. When I went out she started to cry. All I could say was "no, no, no". I knew when I saw her that mom had passed away. That was the beginning of this whole nightmare.

When I saw mom she looked so peaceful...I have never seen her look so content and at peace. At that moment I thought my whole world had ended. I died that day.

Mom found out she had terminal cancer too late...she lived 2 months after she found out. It went into her bloodstream and then into her brain...at the end she didn't know what was going on. I hated to see her like that. I hated everything at that moment...I hated everyone that had a mother. I still do I guess since I can't write this without crying so much that I can't see.

I pray each day the the Goddess will take care of her and make sure she's happy where she is. I just pray that I will have the same regard when I go. Ok, I'm gonna end this post now...I need to go for now.