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KathyM · Mar 20, 2010, 02:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by perpetuallysad

I was reluctant to contribute to this thread because I haven't been particularly thrilled with some of the opinions, or rather, the way the opinions have been portrayed here. But, I do feel I have something to add to a situation where everyone appears to only be focusing on the negative. I live in Mississippi. I am white. My husband is black. My husband happens to be in a career where he interacts a great deal with society all over the state and he is incredibly well respected. I believe if it weren't for this, we would receive a lot more flack about our relationship than we do now. As it is, we often find people, especially older adults, staring us down, saying things that we "aren't supposed" to hear, are blatantly hostile towards us...I mean nearly every time we go out. Of course, this only happens with the people he doesn't know. We've never felt a single bit of disdain from people who know him. This is due, in part, to him working at a large university where the population is very ethnically diverse. Anyway, I say this to illustrate my inside experience of racism in an area of the country that is possibly the most racist.

Anyway, I have also had the opportunity to teach here in the public schools, k-3rd grade (I quit about 2 years ago). Anyway, the public schools are about 60% African American, 30% white, and the other 10% is really diverse because of the University. These kids don't care AT ALL about anyone's race. I realize they are young, but I have never, ever seen or heard the slightest negatively racist thing between these little people. When I was in school, black people and white people, while always friendly, were always very clearly separated...don't know why, but its how it was. But with these kids, you will be hard pressed to ever find a group that is just white kids or just black kids. They have kid arguments and fusses, but it is never anything other than stupid kid stuff. Anyway, I have found great hope in these kids. They do not care at all what race their friend is. The play and share and just love each other the way kids do.

I guess that's all I wanted to add. So as bad as it may seem to everyone all the time, these kids are going to grow up and hopefully they will remain so open and good to each other. Its slow coming, but I do believe that things are changing.

Perpetuallysad

Thank you. People were always very respectful to the black executive at the corporate office too and would never say anything to his face. They did, however, give him the jobs no one else wanted to do.

I worked for the president, and there was an opening for an executive vice president of marketing. HR sent us the resume of a candidate that was so impressive, he already had all the paperwork set to hire the man. In his rush, he never bothered to notice the man was black.

The man showed up for the interview, and sat with me until my boss was out of his meeting. He was a very nice and cordial man. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see everyone peeking in on us and whispering to each other.

After the man entered my bosses office, one of the executives came running over to me to ask why the man was in my office. When I told him he was a candidate for the Sr. VP job, he laughed and said "Oh, he'll never get the job." When I told him my boss already had the paperwork set up, he said "We don't need any more of them here." In response to my look of shock, he said "You know what I mean" then imitated a monkey. Unfortunately, he was right - the man with the Ivy league education and qualifications up the ying-yang did not get the job. Why?

As for the children, I agree with you. My son was only harassed by adults when he was little - the kids didn't care. However, things changed around fifth grade - around the time hormones start to kick in with kids. His childhood friends began to bully and target him with racial slurs - to the point of threatening his life and sending their older siblings/cousins to chase him down for them. Talking to the children didn't help. Talking to the parents didn't help. Talking to the police didn't help. Talking with the teachers didn't help. Talking with the religious leaders didn't help.

As the song from South Pacific goes, you have to be carefully taught to hate. Maybe if more emphasis was placed on the subject during the prepubescent years, it wouldn't turn into such a vicious hatred by the time they become teenagers. However, teaching "tolerance" doesn't appear to be working. What does that even mean? I "tolerate" a cold, but I still hate being sick - and I would never give a cold a permanent job in my body.