If only it were that simple. In his culture turning his back on his family is similar to treason (ok, it's not that extreme but that was the closest thing I could come up with at this moment). When he went to college they told him they wouldn't pay for him to go unless they picked a major they "approved of". Now he's stuck working for them because in the industry he works in, there are no jobs available. We're both almost 30. As far as them knowing about me, he doesn't share any of his life with them outside work. His close uncle knows about me. It's not about allowing them to dictate his existence it's about how he was raised. Therein lies the problem. He needs to do what he needs to do regardless of their disdain, but it is challenging because the rest of the extended family will shun him and turn their backs.