Thread: feeling very alone
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Old Mar 22, 2010, 02:50 PM
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lynn09 lynn09 is offline
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Member Since: Aug 2009
Location: Fringes of the bell-shaped curve
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Quote:
Originally Posted by googley View Post
I'm feeling very alone and sad. My friends made multiple plans this week and did not include me. I don't know how to interpret this. It is just making me really sad that they aren't including me. It's not like they didn't have the chance. It is making me feel like I am being used for my car. Why doesn't anyone ever like me? I'm friendly.
Hi (((((googley))))). I'm sorry you are feeling so sad because your friends did not include you in their plans. Do you ever initiate the planning and invite your friends to join you, or do you wait for them to include you? Waiting for others to invite you to join them is very validating when they do, but can set you up for feeling rejected if for whatever reason they don't. Also, you can't assume that their reason for not including you means that they don't like you. Perhaps you should try to talk to one or more of them and find out their reasons for not including you.

It is also possible that your friends might feel that you aren't really interested in their company or activities if you don't initiate plans and invite them to join you. You say that you feel they might be using you for your car. Although depression can play havoc with our logic and reasoning, that doesn't necessarily negate the validity of our feelings of unease and discomfort. If you think this is a real possibility then you need to find out for certain for the sake of your peace of mind. One way might be to invite your friends to spend time with you doing something that would not require the use of your car and see how they respond.

Having said all of that, perhaps what you really need to do is adjust your perspective regarding your social networking and how you choose your friends; i.e., focus more on who you want and how others fit in your life, rather than trying to figure out if and how you fit in the lives of others. Friends are the family that you choose for yourself and you should always be able to expect that they will treat you better than the rest of the world treats you. Hope you feel better soon and we'll all be here anytime you want/need us.lynn09
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I walked a mile with Sorrow and ne'er a word said she;
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Thanks for this!
Chronic, googley