Quote:
Originally Posted by peaches100
Maybe one mistake i'm making is in comparing my mom to myself. When i think of some of the things my parents did, i know i would never, EVER have responded the way they did. So it is just very hard for me to understand why they did certain things.
Like when i got SA by my neighbor, I would have confronted that man hands down, no doubt whatsoever. I would have called my daughter's friends' parents too, to let them know of the danger. I would have wanted to make sure my daughter wasn't emotionally/mentally harmed by what happened. I would never have just said "Well, don't go over there anymore" and then dropped the whole thing.
I just don't understand that. It's hard for me to believe that any parents who did that really loved their child. So when i think about it, it scares me that perhaps they didn't really love me.
But maybe I'm wrong.
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Peaches, this rings true for me in many ways. My experience was similar. But I've never really doubted that my parents love me. They just handled the situation very badly. They just didn't know any different at the time, but they weren't out to hurt me. I can forgive them for that. They didn't intend to cause me pain even though how they handled things has caused me pain. It wasn't about a lack of love; it was just a poor parenting decision. As a parent now, I hope I never make such a drastic mistake, but if I do, I know it won't be because I didn't love my children. Maybe you can separate their poor decision from it being an indication of their love for you. They aren't necessarily the same thing.