nummd in more "bad copin skill" ways. several. just emailed t to "let her know" since that seems to be all she will allow.
i am not sure i can care anymore about therapy. this is too big to merely put a bandaid on while it heals itself. and if i can't get the help i evidently need, and there's no appropriate "out" then i might as well leave all the masks and dissociative walls up. There are some people out there (who deal with what I do) that are fortunate enough to find a great t AND have that t stick with them all the way.
I'd like one please - or i'm done.