I think you are amazing and strong and doing your best in a hard situation. I understand that sometime emotional abuse/manipulation can be so much harder to talk about and deal with than physical because noone sees it or understands. My family played the guilt card on me too, I spent so many years trying to please them until I also questioned whether I wouldn't be better of ending it all. I did end it all, but in a more positive way. I took my life into my own hands, just like you. It was hard, it was lonely, but it was soooo worth it. It took time, but eventually I even managed to reform relationships with my family, when I was strong enough that they couldn't hurt me anymore. Now I am actually gad for what I went through - it has made me who I am today. I am kinder, more compassionate, stronger, and I understand other people (just like you! :-) ) much better. My family even look up to me now, they see me as independent and capable and ask for my advice.
But I had to take care of myself first. You are clearly brave enough to take drastic action - just make sure it is positive action for YOU. Put yourself first, and trust me, you will be glad you did!
I wish you all the best!
xx