I'm sorry you are having such a rough time right now, dahliaq.
You need to find support and help right now.
Have you looked into any support groups in your area?
Many times they are free or only ask for a good will offering if you can afford it.
Or might there be a community health center that could provide counseling? In some of my searching on the internet I found some resources in my area that take into consideration a person's financial situation and offer 'scholarships' or reduced fees so people who need it but can't afford it can still get help.
Keep posting here if it helps, and know you are not alone.