Thanks Richard,

The rum belongs to my mother not me, she doesn't drink but has it there incase someone comes by, so I can't throw it out.

No, I don't have a sponsor either only PC forums to vent my feelings.

I guess I'm not eating well either trying to lose weight, for 2 weeks I was on this really drastic diet, no fruits, no carbs, no sweets, no high glycemic vegetables. just meats, cheeses, yogurt, eggs, nuts,fish and soya products. Which really broke me down so badly that now I'm down with the flu, I think I lost my natural resistance to fight it off. that's probably why I losing control and my mind.

but thanks for you advice

Lisa