I think things are getting better... he seems to be opening up a little bit... the only problem right now is that we hardly get the chance to talk on the phone, which, that and texting is the only way we can communicate except once a week, sometimes two, when we get the chance to see each other in person.
I really don't think this has anything to do with the fact that he's not willing to try to love me, I think instead, in fact he told me, that he's worried he might not ever have the capability of loving anybody because of what happened. I believe that is not true, no matter what anybody goes through in their life, I think everyone can find love.
This is making me feel a bit like I will never be loved, which he doesn't understand, and he thinks that at my age love should not be important, but I disagree. Also, because I know that he doesn't love me that is making me want to be with him so much more, which I can't explain, I can only understand.
I think we are doing better now, we are fighting less about unimportant things. I still feel hurt, but I am realizing now that I think I would rather be with him and help him through what happened to him and listen to him than leave him and try and find someone else that can truly love me. I want to help him through this, and even if it turns out he will never actually love me, maybe that doesn't really matter, and all that matters is that I love him.
I'm still confused, but having the chance to think about everything helped me a lot.