Define recently? Maybe not the case with you, but people who just get out of one relationship/engagement/marriage and wonder why they don't see fireworks with the first person they go out with are only hurting themselves and others. A PhD in psychology is not needed to figure that out, I know because I figured it out. What's wrong with taking a year off from dating, rediscovering the new you, and it will be a different you, and go slow? Have we not all at one time dated someone who just got out of a relationship? They stand out like a neon sign. We look the same way when we do that also. Despite the intense feelings to want to be with someone and to stop the hurt from before, we fail to give ourselves credit by trying to find ways to make this "new" relationship work, when we shouldn't even be in it in the first place. Sometimes just not being in a relationship is the answer.