She said no and that is okay, well it should be okay. I am feeling rejected and I need to get past it! It is an awful feeling. It is that feeling when you (I) go to that devastating place. The first thing I want to do is cancel my next appointment and I am fighting the urge.

I will not talk to her about it, I never do. I do not know why. Maybe I do not want to admit it, maybe I do not want her to know or risk feeling vulnerable. Who knows!

These feelings of going to that devastating place have got to come to an end!! I am losing the battle!

Thanks
Xtree