thanks for all the comments--I can see a lot to relate to here.
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Originally Posted by deliquesce
oh sunny, i would probably giggle a bit at "resonate", or be put off, depending on the person who said it. it does seem very therapy-speak to me.
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Originally Posted by griffinp
I don't think it's annoying necessarily....it probably just makes other people who don't regularly use those "therapy words" do a double-take.
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LOL, I know, Deli. And I don't even perceive "resonate" to be at therapy word since I used it on occasion before I even began therapy (we have never said that in therapy), but it just comes out of my mouth more frequently now since I can better detect my feelings. Griffin, my town probably isn't as "crunchy" as yours, but I think there's a fair bit of the yoga-type speak here too, so saying "resonate" doesn't sound too strange among the natives. That may explain why this particular person seemed annoyed and mocked me--she is from a different part of the country, and I would guess that phrase isn't used there much, and if it is, it might be cause for derision. So to be charitable, her reaction may be because of where she is from.
One of the best things I learned to say from my T (and it actually was outside of therapy that I learned to say this from him--in his other role), was to let the other person know they were heard/understood, and this can remove some tension. So after the person has said something, I learned to respond with "I understand what you are saying...." and then finish the sentence with "but I don't agree," and then explain my point of view. That way the other person doesn't get stuck on thinking that you just don't understand them and that if they only explained themselves more, you would get it. It is OK to disagree--big lesson for me!