((((((((((((((Jexa))))))))))))))
You are a brave person who cares so much about others that you are willing to to expose your pain to prevent others from going through the same thing. None of this is your fault. The shame and guilt belongs to your abuser, ALL the fault belongs to your abuser.
HE is the person who is ruining your grandmothers life, because he put his own perverse and selfish desires ahead of his family.

You are trying to protect and help your family - and like many courageous and noble people who do the 'right' thing, - others are trying to make you feel bad about it. DO NOT let them make you feel bad.
You are doing the RIGHT thing. You are doing what needs to be done.
The secrets need to be exposed and out in the open.
Stay strong, dearest Jexa.

I'm really glad you were able to find some support and feel better last night. It's ok to take care of yourself and stay distracted.
And keep posting if it helps. My PM box is always open if you want to vent.......here for you...............