Mixedupemotions,

I'm sorry you're in so much pain right now. I'm sure we've all had an experience of doing something in a weak moment that we really regretted later. So we can empathize with you. As much as we try to be a "rock," we're human. And emotions can be pretty powerful. They can defy reason.

I'm sorry your group members were disappointed in you. Their reactions are probably based on their concern for your welfare. They want you to be happy and not caught up in a dysfunctional, painful relationship.

Right now would be a good time for you to ground yourself. There's no need to do anything about the situation right this exact moment, is there? If possible, allow yourself time to calm down. Once your emotions have settled, it will be easier for you to get back into your logical frame of mind and reaffirm your stand.

Try not to take responsibility for your ex's feelings now, or for how your t will feel when you tell him what happened. Deal with your own feelings, and let them deal with theirs. I know it's hard, but it's a boundary thing.

When will you see your t next??