Hello, LovebirdsFlying. Do you have a psychiatrist and therapist? You need help. Please get it.

Go through these and challenge every negative thing you have been told or believe:http://psychcentral.com/lib/2009/15-...e-distortions/

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/sel...9/METHOD=print

Please keep on posting so we know how you are doing.