(((((( jexa ))))))) I understand very well what you describe with the cycle of guilt and doubt. My T tells me "Trust your body" ... The body stores memories and they are very accurate. He will often ask me when I am in that mental doubt/guilt cycle "What is your body telling you right now?" When I actually listen with my heart and feel what my body knows - well it is very clear. Of course then the mind tries to go to doubt again... but I think with time, the truth is winning.