I guess for me it would depend on the relationship, why he doesn't have a job now, why his girlfriend is breaking up/throwing him out after five years, etc. I'd be more willing to lend a bit of money/help him with a plan to get on his feet than have him become "dependent" on me again. There are jobs out there and I'd be inclined to take any job, to have some money coming in, rather than get in such a low condition to begin with.

No matter how great the relationship between myself and my son, it can only get strained with his moving home with me. Each has their own life. I think it would be too hard for me to keep a hands-off attitude and let my son live his own life (you can't make rules with another grownup, no matter whether they're one's child, on how they must run their life). To be in such a low situation one needs more help than I can give and I'd be more inclined to try and find a good shelter/group home or program to help my grown son than to take on direct help ever again.

Too, he is a man and I'd want another man to "deal" with him so my husband would be in charge and if I have no husband/boyfriend at the time, I'd find a social worker/someone I could trust to help me with my son and his obvious problems. I don't think one gets in such dire situations without having a few problems of one's own making and I am not equipped to be the best help. That my son would ask me, his mother, instead of a guy friend to crash at that person's place for awhile does not bode well.