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Mar 31, 2010, 05:38 PM
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Member Since: Jun 2009
Location: Nova Scotia
Posts: 5,146
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Thank God I have my PC friends , I don't know what I would do without you all. Many of you know from the past that I can become quite down and with time I always seem to break out of it for a while , which is a good thing. Lately , I've been feeling hopeless and really tired of feeling this way . I have suicidal thoughts at least 10 times a day , everyday . I know none of you can really cure me of these thoughts , but I feel better telling someone what's on my mind.
To be honest , I'm scared if something really bad were to happen , I'm not sure what I would do. Many of you know the feeling of loneliness , feeling unloved , just existing. It can become overwhelming. I am scared to die , I think all of us are to a certain extent. I guess it could always be worse , but that doesn't make me feel any better , not for long anyways. I miss my old P-doc , she asked me many questions and was a good listener. My new P-doc doesn't ask many questions and is just experimenting with medications at the moment. I don't think I have to worry much about a suicide attempt anyway . I'm so stressed out that I will probably die from a heart attack or stroke . Just leave a hug and I will appreciate it very much.
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 Depression is not a weakness ...... it is a sign that you have been strong for too long.
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