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When I bring up discomfort when he is acting "friendly," I find that it often just exacerbates the situation, i.e., he makes a scene, calls me out on being "standoffish," etc.
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He is using emotional blackmail.
You can stick to
"No." "Keep your hands to yourself".
It doesn't matter if he has his little hissy fit and makes a scene. You are still entitled to stick to your guns.
You are entitled to decide who touches you, who puts his arm around you.