I've made attempts, and while I have no intention now of carrying it out, at present I'm gloomy enough to say that I might welcome.... a certain occurrence. I won't name that occurrence; don't want to trigger. But I think it might be easy to guess.

With the current family situation, though, I am glad I'm still here because some of my family might not be able to handle the loss of *yet another* relative. And, I am still positive enough to see good things. I enjoy my toddler grandson, and I have another grandchild coming up in early October. Plus, my husband and daughters do love me.