Oh my god! I can't even think of ANYTHING a 17-month-old child could do to deserve a spanking, let alone a beating! I was told that the point of a spanking is to humiliate (which still seems cruel and pointless), but how would a toddler understand that?? I was also "spanked" as a child, though I'm certain that it was more about my dad releasing his anger than "disciplining" me. A toddler is supposed to cry. Maybe not all the time, maybe yours does cry a little too much, but when they can't talk, they have no other way to express themselves. Beating him would only teach him to suppress his feelings. I'd say, stick to your guns. Don't let some idiot talk you into doing something that you're against. Let him do that to his child; in 10 years, when his kid is off stealing and getting in trouble with the cops, sit back and think to yourself: "I knew it."