Cutting contact again may help but I can't take my own advice.. I still have contact with my ex and some days it just about kills me.
When I haven't spoken to him it is much easier.
My T says that to try to become friends (which is what it sounds like you are trying) there needs to be a total separation.. months and months. Time for healing, moving forward and letting the pain go away.
Huge hugs for you xxxxxxx