Hello everyone, this is my first time here and I am not sure exactly where to start or what I really want to say for that matter.
I am married, but feel like I am a single mom to 3 great kids. I am so very fustrated and out of my mind all the time. I dont know what to do.
My husband gets up in the morning to go to work( he is supposed to be there at 8am) usually late, and when he comes home he walks through the door and goes streight to his computer, where he sits for hours on end usually up in to the wee hours of the morning. I feel so alone and abandoned. It is hard for me to raise my 3 kids on my own and take care of everything with the house and such. It is though he has no intrest in me or anything that we ( the kids and myself) do. I dont feel like a wife or that my kids have a dad for the most part. Sometimes if I nag enough he will go to functions that the kids have( rare).This will sometimes end in a fight b/c he does not really want to be there and wants to leave.
I have very bad deppression(all my life) so all of this does not help.
But I tend to loose it at times and just loose my mind. I will just yell at him for no apparent reason. or I will throw something at him. but the bad thing is sometimes I dont even know what made me made in the first place. He says that there is something wrong with me and that I should see a Dr. Of course I always say it is stress and exaustion from taking care of everything and everyone.Usually after a bad temper episode the deppression will kick in and I will be in this state for several days. crying all the time or just feeling so lost and lonely, and worthless.

I am just rambling and I am sorry for that.I just have so many feelings that they just seem to pour out at once.

I know that I have issues, but I also know that my family situation is not helping those issues. I have tried and tried to talk to him and tell him how he makes me feel and that he has to pay me attention and the kids too.
I feel like I am such a burden for needing so much from him, I tell him that I am sorry for being so high maintence.

sorry for rambling on and on

Tabi