i cancelled today because of the stuff he said last week when i saw him. but then i saw pdoc afterwards and pdoc wants me to keep seeing austin-t, so i said ok. but pdoc said he would talk to austin-t first and fix things, and he hasn't done that yet (that i know of) so i didn't go today because things still aren't fixed with austin-t. but i trust pdoc to fix things and i think he will fix it by next week which is why i asked for an appt next week.

but i guess austin-t doesn't know any of that so it must look weird to him. im too scared of him right now though to try and explain.