Oh my sweet sweet heart Belle....I didn't know about this thread till I read the other thread and Sanity maintained about this one.....
My sweet heart you do have all rights to be sad over this....I don't know what I would have done if I were you.....but I know one thing....I would never ever wanted him back in my life.....and I would never ever talk to him....
If these thoughts are bothering you this much, I would suggest you to face them and go ask him directly....but think about it before asking him....are you okay if his answers are not pleasant....then do you want to know those answers at all? if so, then go and get your answers....again, if I were you, I would avoid all those nasty answers....because either way is not happy....
just a second thought....probably...these are just your imagination....probably...there was nothing....just try to not fuel it...push those thoughts away from your mind and think that there was a reason for not be with him and believe that it's the best for you....
you are such a great person and good things are on your way....I can see your good progress....just keep going with your life....you are young and beautiful....enjoy it....
with love
marjan
p.s. do you go to GYM at all? doing some kinds of physical activities would lift up your mood