Quote:
Originally Posted by BNLsMOM
That is why I think she is treating me with either palcebos or with such tiny doses that they wouldn't even treat a mouse with bipolar, to see if I lose it and make her fake conversation come true.
I am going to look up all my meds online and make sure I am on the real thing and that they are good doses for effective treatment. (The first thing she said to me when I walked in was, "So have you been looking up all your meds and working yourself into a frenzy?" I am the sort of person who wants to be a "good patient" so by saying this to me, I feel like I did the wrong thing when I was looking up my meds for side effects. She doesn't want me to look up my meds because she thinks I am too suggestible and will take on side effects that are listed. Also she doesn't want me to be suggestible to the fact that I am on doses that won't treat me. She knows I will look stuff up.
I really don't want to go back to her.
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She can't treat you with placebos without your consent. That's on the lines of a conspiracy theory. Just stop that thinking. It's not based in reality.
As far as good doses for effective treatment, she told you that your lithium level is too low. She's told you that you are on very low doses. They probably aren't at therapeudic levels because you have had side effect problems. She told you that. Doesn't sound like she's hiding anything from you there at all. It isn't wrong for her to talk to you about suggestability. Some people really do have problems with suggestibility when it comes to looking at side effect lists for meds. That sounds like she's being pretty straight with you.
Have you made any headway in getting an appointment with another pdoc? I hope you do soon for a little peace of mind.