Speaking as a Mom of a 21 year old that struggled a long time before she really opened up and shared with me, I am pleading with you, go to a Psychiatrist! Moms and Dads don't intuitively know about things like this, you need to get well and if Mom thinks a p-doc only pushes pills, then she will need to get educated about it. I am certain that your parents love you and would do anything for you, my wish is that I had been brought into the picture sooner and could have been more supportive to my daughter. Go to the specialist, get strong and share with your parents. They love you and need to understand what you are going through.