Thanks so much for the encouragement, SophiaG, and the great insight, Turquosesea! You're absolutely right when it comes to not "working" to be happy--but I do have a bad habit of hiding emotions from myself.

Today I had a bit of a breakdown and ended up crying in my girlfriend's arms. FINALLY broke through whatever wall I was keeping between me and my emotions and admitted to myself that I am working desperately, desperately hard while my mental health issues are getting worse and worse and my parents have rejected me, and it's becoming overwhelming. I felt SO much better after that and things are looking a little better--applied for one job, sent out a feeler for another, and went to my evening class even though I didn't want to.

Thank you everyone for your support. You are all so kind. Turquoisesea, if you ever want to PM me or chat about what's going on with you to compare notes, please feel free!