You make total sense to me Kathy. It is a challenge not to over invest in people's choices and to sometimes unknowingly attached strings or expectations to any support or advice offered. I guess I don't like to admit how often I do that but if I do then I am more likely to change the behaviour in the future. I know part of the motivation is to validate myself and assure myself that I did or said something useful. If my advice is ignored than I judge myself more than I do the other person. I think I wasted their time with my useless advice. It could go either way I suppose whereby I would then criticize them for not listening to my wisdom. There was a time in my life where that would absolutely be the case but it seems since my bipolar kicked into high gear the last decade I am generally just not that secure in what I offer anyone and will look for them to validate me. Following my advice has become one form of them demonstrating my worth. Geesh... pretty self absorbed how I make someone else's situation become all about me. Dang! Something more for me to ponder. lol. Now I will ask for you to please excuse my manic thinking and potentially endless rambling.

Thank you for sharing your stories.