I'm sorry feary. I also have been where you're at right now, hanging on by a thread. Life is all about change, believe me it will get better, nothing stays the same. I'm in my sixties now, but I was a newlywed at your age. Every day is a new beginning. You have your children to be strong for, they will keep you going on even your darkest night, they depend on you. When you're ready, you will move forward. You're in a stage of attempting to gather strength, it's different for everyone. Without hope there is no life, hold on to this thought while going through the storm. We all care so much because we have been there too.