ShadowDancer.

No, you're not babbling. What you're saying makes sense and you've been a fantastic help. You're right when you say she doesn't know how to operate outside of relationships. At 14, her innocence was essentially snatched from her and since that period -- such an important, developmental age -- she has been in and out of relationships. As much as it pains me to know she is with Jack, I can understand why. He's a known quantity -- in spite of the fact he's a pot addicted, potentially violent man.

I think the best place to be right now is an objective one. I have felt incredibly angry and viewing this as a personal rejection, as well as trying to make sense out of inconsistent behavior. Best I step back and not view these actions as coming from a healthy, stable personality. Otherwise I'll continually be lurching back and forth forever making no sense out of it.

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mrb023077 said:
i always thought i would never find someone to understand me, to love me for me. But i did. He has been there for me even when i felt i didnt deserve him.
I am so sorry that you are having to deal with this. I am sorry that she is having to deal with this also.

We are here for you, to support you through this, ok?

((((((((((((((((((cmfox)))))))))))

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Thanks.

I'm sorry she has to deal with this too. I'm sorry she has had to reject a genuinely nice, loving guy who would have stuck through thick and thin. I would like -- somehow -- to convey to her that I'm not angry and that, at any time in the future, I'm here for support if she needs it and wants a friend -- as I'd like to still consider her one. Sadly, that gesture too may be trampled upon. It would offend her self-reliant nature and be another sharp reminder of the sort of person that I am.

I have a friendship stone which she gave me. It was broken in two, so thought I could use it as a gesture. Just a half in the mail and ask her to hold on to it... I thought it would be symbolic. I guess a part of me hopes in such a gesture she might break down and cry, seeing what she's done and come to me for support. It seems the more likely response would be bitterness.