Hi Fool,
My T might not intend to sound dismissive, but that's how I tend to read him. It's either that he really is hostile toward me and can't disguise it, or he just has a habit of phrasing things a certain way, with that deadpan expression of his, that causes me to interpret what he's saying in a critical way.

When I ask for clarification, he always disavows any intention of antagonizing me.

This "gut feeling" thing tends to come up when I describe being antagonized by other people. My therapist thinks I'm oversensitive, so he's been trying to convince me of the possbility that my gut reactions to things might be mistaken.

I guess I resent his use of the "gut feeling" phrase. It's sacred to me, and I'm protective of it! I trust my gut! It's possible I'm oversensitive, and I'm willing to work on that. I might misinterpret something a person says, for instance, in a negative way that may not reflect how the person intended it.

But if I also have a strong gut feeling that that person is being hostile, I tend to go with it. My gut feeling helps me to interpret behavior and language that would be ambiguous without it. Without my gut feelings about my interactions with others, face-to-face interaction would be like email -- no extra information at all. My gut allows me to have interpretations of facial expression and tone and body language. I rely on my sense of the emotional coloration of the things people say to me. So I resent it when my therapist seems to discount all of that.

And I do it with him! When he says stuff like that to me, I can tell if he's being accepting of me or not. When he dismisses me, he kind of squints. When he wants to reach me, he leans back in his chair and stretches his legs out toward me.

He's really inconsistent and ambiguous, with his moods and the things he says. I think he's just really hard to read, or I'm just complete crap at reading him for whatever reason. (sigh)

Anyway Zero, thanks so much for your comment and thoughts! I know I do tend to assume the worst with this guy. Maybe I should parse it a little more obejctively next time