(((((((Typo)))))))
That "circle" you're describing sounds more like a big ol' spiral staircase to me. Could you have written... this post, say... a year ago? Two years ago?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Typo
I seem to be getting really good at invalidating myself, and my experinces, sometimes I wonder if I'm "too sensitive" and maybe things I went through aren't really that traumatic, that I'm just blowing them out of porportion and letting them have too big a hold on my life.
|
Invalidating yourself is just one more thing you sometimes do. You're already describing it from a slightly different viewpoint than if you were smack in the middle of doing it and completely buying into it. Maybe I shouldn't give away the plot like this, but as you do it some more you may start to notice (if you haven't already) that (a.) it doesn't actually mean anything and (b.) you often have more interesting things you can be doing.
Quote:
|
It seems I'm stuck in this cycle, this endless circle of getting somewhere, then falling apart and invalidating myself, becoming full of fear and isolating.
|
If you're noticing that getting somewhere seems to stir up invalidating yourself, you might try looking at it from the other direction:
Non-quote:
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Not actually posted yet by Typo
I feel like invalidating myself again -- I must be
getting somewhere!
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Quote:
I've never really had any stabilty in my life, and I CRAVE it..
the problem is, I don't know how to get it, and I have an issue of freaking out when I have it, T worries maybe I sabtoge stablity in my life, because all I know is chaos and disorder...
|
All the stability I know, feels pretty much like surfing on chaos and disorder. YMMV.
I'm probably biased. Complain as you will about how everything's about to fall apart for you, to me it always looks like you're doing just fine.
(((((((Typo)))))))
--------------------------------------
Don't believe everything you think.